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Dogs and Dead Husbands

pets widow Oct 15, 2019

Originally Posted on 7/22/19

Y’all, we adopted the most adorable bundle of happiness and floof at the end of last week. My son has wanted his own dog for AGES. Honestly, I wasn’t down for being responsible for another living thing, gnomesayin’? So I did what any excellent parent would do, I came up with a way to delay the inevitable for as long as possible.

Enter, The Dog Chart.

My son had to take responsibility for all of our pets until I decided he was responsible enough to have his very own, and then we would open up our minds to finding the most perfect rescue dog for our family.

Let’s dissect that sentence.

My son had to take responsibility for all of our pets – Less work for me.

until I decided he was responsible enough to have his very own, – an undisclosed amount of time so I can put this off for as long as possible.

and then we would open up our minds to finding the most perfect rescue dog for our family. – setting the expectation that we’re not going to go out and drop hundreds on a puppy one day, mkayyyy. (I’m not judging those who want that, it was just my preference to adopt an older dog.)

I kid, I kid. Sort of. He took care of the animals – which means fed and let them outside – for months, and he continues to do so. He’s genuinely doing a great job and completely deserves to have his own dog. He held up his end of the deal, so I’ll hold up mine.

All of our animals, except the hamster, are rescue animals in a way. Bear was given to me 12 years ago by a family friend who got him from some rando who didn’t want him anymore. Mia has been passed from owner to owner, eventually settling in my lap after Jason died (she was his dog). Garage Kitty – most of you know the story of Kitty – appeared in my garage one day almost 3 years ago and never left. Now she hunts geckos (and probably other stuff) outside and she curls up on abandoned pillows to nap inside. Also, I’ve been allergic to cats all my life and now suddenly I’m not. Coincidence? Nah.

And now we have Shelbee. We’ll never fully know his story, but he is legit perfect for us. He’s playful and cuddly and literally all he wants is for you to love him. He lets my son pick him up and carry him, which Bear does not. Shelbee didn’t know his name before he came to us, so my son named him Shelbee after a character from Adventure Time, and he spelled it “Shelbee” rather than “Shelby” when I asked him how to spell it, which reminds me of Jason. Bees always remind me of him because he LOVED bees – he even wanted a bee hive in our yard, which was a hard no from me. Absolutely not.

Bear and Mia are super old – both 15, but Mia acts more like she’s 115 – so it’s fun to have some new energy in the house. Shelbee reminds me a lot of how Bear was many moons ago – playful and sweet.

Getting a new dog has really made me feel like we’re moving forward with our lives after Jason died. It’s been over a year and we’ve certainly had lots of life events and milestones, but some feel more poignant than others. Bringing a new life and new energy into our lives is a giant leap forward into the rest of our lives, and I’m here for it while still respecting and appreciating Jason’s memory, our life together and the people we’ve become since we knew him and felt his loss. I’m here for all of it.

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